Sunday, February 5, 2012

A no-brainer?

What can brown do for you?
As I've been getting ready to formally launch my people/dog training business (and to boldly go where no human or canine has gone before, split infinitives be damned), I've been seeking out advice from many corners, trying to sort and synthesize the ideas that seem most salient to my own particular enterprise. The ideal of "synergy" has become clich├ęd to the point of comedy, but it's worth pursuing nonetheless, particularly in this context. Given that dog training is primarily about bringing diverse desires into harmonious alignment, it makes perfect sense to extrapolate that goal out to one's business relations. So trainers ally themselves with sitters and vets and shelters and other trainers, and so we all sustain the flow of good things and the trust that follows in their wake.

Well, the muse of synergy tapped me on the shoulder the other day and whispered naughtily in my ear. Why not partner my dog training business with an escort service? Preferably one that employs men as well as women, and preferably one with an emphasis on role-playing and a warehouse full of costumes. How wonderful it would be if -- in my work with a reactive dog -- I could make one call and summon a physically imposing man in a UPS uniform, or a woman in scrubs to play vet tech? One day I might say, "Bring a dozen hats and a long, yellow raincoat." On another day, "Hey, do you still have that Dick Cheney mask? Excellent. A briefcase would be good, too."

I'm pretty sure no one has done this yet, and I think I'd better wait until my business is well enough established that such a partnership would be advantageous to the escorts, too. But anyone who wants to run with the idea has my blessing!


  1. My dog has a penchant for French Maids.

    1. I suspect that this may be an instance of anthropomorphic projection... not to say that's always a bad thing.